Intervention Knows No Season

Fall . . . a time of year when we think of holidays, of family, of giving thanks, of being together, of joy and love, good friends and good food. For families suffering with addiction, the holidays are anything but these things. Addiction doesn't go away, take a break or give us a reprieve because the festivities of the season are upon us. In fact, it can be quite the opposite; the ugliness of the disease comes out in all its glory.

As family and friends slowly and with trepidation come to the conclusion that intervention might be a viable option for them, they then struggle with when to move forward and do it. The obstacles are many . . . Thanksgiving with family is planned . . . kids are in college and have exams . . . travel is so hard during the holidays . . . let's not ruin everyone's festive mood . . . Yes, the holidays are a convenient obstacle.

In reality, there is never a "perfect" time to address this issue; it is an issue the family has hoped they would never have to address at all. But alas, addiction runs its own course and holidays are not a shield to illness or a reason for putting off serious healthcare. Rather than focusing on the obstacles of the holidays, consider the benefits they offer; the family is coming together anyway, intervention is a gift of love and what better time to give it than the season of giving, what better way to say "I love you!"

If you or your family need help, there is no better time to reach out for it!

Prop 5: A Trojan Horse?

Some people believe California's Prop 5 to be something of a Trojan Horse . . . on the outside it looks great, but on the inside it is filled with dangerous things. Voters will have to decide that on election day for themselves. But, I have to again ask the question, why do we (and I include society here) let things get so bad? By the time the person (addict) comes to the attention of law enforcement, they have been in their disease a long time. Do you really think that the first, second, third arrest is the first time anyone knows this person has a drug or alcohol problem?? Get real. Lots of people know. Their families, their friends, their neighbors, their bosses, their co-workers, people who have cleaned up their consequences (i.e. lawyers, doctors, social workers, clergy). But those who have seen it have either missed the signs entirely or have chosen to turn a blind eye. Had one person, just one, stepped up and sought professional help the chances are the police and the courts would never become involved. Would it prevent every criminal case fueled by drugs from becoming a criminal case? No. But, if it prevented one in 5 or one in 10 from reaching the criminal justice system the savings would be unimaginable!!

The next time you see an over-the-top crime that hits the headlines, look for "the bottle in the picture." By that I mean the drugs or the alcohol. Chances are you will find them. We have another one that has just hit the scene . . . the tragic story of the family of star Jennifer Hudson. What an awful waste. All of the facts are not in, more investigation is being done. But, already crack cocaine is surfacing in this story. Am I surprised?? Sadly, I'm not. Sober, healthy people don't generally get so out of control committing crimes like this. Would intervention have prevented this? Perhaps not. Perhaps professional intervention was done long ago. Perhaps many times. I doubt it, but maybe so. What I do know is this . . . chemotherapy does not work in all cases. But, we use it as soon as we can. We don't wait. And, we don't not use it because it isn't successful every time.

The Economics of Family Intervention

No doubt about it, we are upon hard economic times and people all across the country are tightening their belts. But, is it money wisely saved to skimp on treating the disease of addiction? Should families save their pennies and wait for the economy to brighten before tackling this nasty family illness? Or, should they use their money to address the disease and heal?

Some Basic Facts:

Fact: The disease does not slow down because the economy does.
Fact: Ignoring, transcending or denying the disease costs families money.
Fact: Expensive and nasty consequences from the disease WILL happen.
Fact: Costly consequences will continue to happen until the disease is treated.
Fact: Money spent on consequences does nothing to address the disease itself.
Fact: Families can choose; spend money on consequences . . . or spend it on help.

Intervention and treatment of addictive disease is largely not covered by insurance like cancer, heart disease and other illnesses are. But, understanding that the disease is robbing the pocketbook through consequences that we can not control, doesn't it make sense to proactively stop the financial bleeding ourselves? The old saying, "You have to spend to save" could not ring more true than with this disease. The best news: you save more than money when you spend it on addiction help.

California Prop 5: Addiction Treatment or Get out of Jail Free Card?

Hear all the buzz around Prop 5? Addiction is a disease; treat it, don't punish it. Treatment saves money and lives. Addicts are sick, not bad people. Drug dealers are criminals killing our children and need to be behind bars. Letting dealers off the hook with lighter sentences is not the answer.
Political rhetoric aside there are certain inalienable truths about addiction, treatment and recovery. Addiction IS a disease. It is treatable. Most of those needing treatment don't get it (the why's are for another blog post). Intervention, treatment and recovery save lives and money. But, drug dealers are criminals. Their product kills. Many are not addicts themselves; they are just "business people." Drunk drivers are criminals. Their actions kill. Are they the same? Should they receive the same punishment? Should they be punished at all?
Better question . . . Why do families wait until this point? Why hasn't someone close to the addict gotten professional help for this DISEASE long before the criminal charges start piling up? Try this on for size . . . if someone had taken the time, effort and interest to intervene professionally, gotten the help they and their loved one needed the criminal charges could have been avoided altogether in most situations. Does intervention save lives? Absolutely. Does it save money??? ABSOLUTELY. Does it save things money can't buy? ABSOLUTELY to the n'th power!!!
There are good, well-reasoned arguments on both sides of the Prop 5 debate. But, isn't a better solution one where families seek professional help themselves and intervene rather than waiting for the police and courts to do so?
You will have the opportunity to voice your opinion in the ballot box soon. Until then, care to let us know what you think here??

Interventionist Interview, Author Tony Boyle and his new book Beyond Passion

My interview with Tony Boyle author of a new book on Alcoholism's toll on families. The Australian author talks about "Beyond Passion".

Intervention? What if the Family Doesn't Agree?

John's life is a mess and the family knows it. They've discussed the problems ad nauseum . . . his recent firing, wife left him, kids won't speak to him, his depression, his latest arrest . . . oh, the list goes on. Someone in the family notes his drinking or drugging. It's the problem they claim. But, the rest of the family is unsure. Is it that big? Does it have any bearing on the other problems in his life?? If so, how much? The family is at odds. One or two people think the drinking/drugging is a big problem, perhaps THE problem. Others don't agree or are unsure. What now?

Ask yourself this . . . is John's drinking ever a topic of concern or discussion in this family? Has it ever played a role in any of his problems? If so, it is significant enough to warrant consideration as the main culprit in John's life difficulties. A short phone consult can give you and your family more answers and insight. In all likelihood you will find yourselves on the same page and able to move forward in the appropriate direction. That direction may NOT be intervention, but you will do so with professional input and guidance.

Intervention! Who Decides?

When a person's drinking, drugging or other addiction becomes a problem who is it who decides to do a professional family intervention? Is it the person closest to the addict/alcoholic (a spouse or parent), a friend or a more distant relative? Is it one person or a group?

The answer is that anyone can decide to start or investigate the intervention process. Generally, it is someone close to the alcoholic/addict although sometimes it is someone more distant (a therapist, clergy member, doctor, lawyer, co-worker or colleague) who suggests the idea to a closer family member who then picks up the ball and runs with it. A commonly held belief is that the whole family group has to be in agreement before the process can even be broached. This is not so and it rarely is. It simply takes one person willing to investigate the option. From here, if others in the family group are willing to learn about professional intervention and engage a short consult with an interventionist, they can quickly learn if intervention is an appropriate option for their situation. If it is, one person generally spearheads the process and the group is on their way. It is not uncommon for people to have fears and doubts around the process, but with guidance all of this is overcome.

So, know this: It is a myth that everyone in the family system has to agree before professional intervention can be considered. It just takes one person to get the ball rolling. With professional help others are educated and join in and the momentum to move from pain to solution is started.

But, what happens if the family is not in agreement as to what the "real" problem is? What role does the alcoholic/addict's attitude have on the intervention process? Stay tuned for answers to these questions.